True Urban Legends

ok, right, where the frick have i been?

the usual places in my empire, as well as expozine, working on my first movie (as a writer), at the gym, and skipping school to go to indian buffets.

also, i've started watching LOST, and i think it might be the start of a new tv series love affair.

it's one of those things where there are all the elements that are so cliche that you can't stop watching.

from the first episode and a half, i've deduced the prescence of the following characters:

-the noble white couple (man's a doctor, woman's a strong-willed yet virtuous woman) who are the leaders of the adventure they've found themselves in

-the terrorist (arab-looking) vs. the criminal (white badass)

-the freaking korean couple (always gotta have the asians who only speak asian and segreate themselves) husband is the disciplinarian and wife is the subserviant

-black father (perhaps absentee) who's doing his best with his son who is troubled, but son finds solace more with old white dude who teaches him how to play board games where there are white and black pieces

-pregnant lady

-fat guy

-spoiled brat

-drug addict

these are all elements that make for an irresistable series, and on dvd format, even better because i can't be barraged with the commercials that have now followed me to the movies. speaking of which, Stranger Than Fiction was a delightful film. and all i'm saying is that that is a good descriptor of my life right now.

but back to LOST, is it me, or is it just a modern day set-up for Lord of the Flies?

ok, off to go work out my upper body. damn, my trainer's harsh. did you know that eating a bagel is like having 5 pieces of bread because of how dense it is? merde. 

every now and again in your life, you will meet a girl who fashions clothing out of metal, business cards out of wood, looks at your fingers as you check your email and decides that your flanges need clogs and that she will make them for you. someone who is down to shake her booty for every party and attend waterfights with the absolute most gusto.

she will stuff your face at guu, send you emails of dogs dressed up in funny outfits, dogs talking and amazing 11 year old yodellers.

i am so lucky to know such a smashing woman, and i dedicate this blog to her, miss erika ryan....

for all the vancouver people, and even if you're in australia, it will be worth the ticket to check her out...she's got a show, and i'll take the descriptors straight outta the artist's mouth:

"on November 30 2006, i will be a part of the Urban Desire 2006 at the
Azure Lounge by the Plaza of Nations, where there will be fashion,
art, and entertainment. there are 6 other fashion designers who will
be showing their collection of 8 pieces each, and i have been invited
to show case two of mine during the pre-show.

There will also be artists presenting paintings and what nots, and
performers either dancing or singing, and there will also be fire
performers. the details are still being worked out, but you can go to
http://www.bluelite.ca/SE_UrbanDesire.htm for more details on bios of
people taking part, and updates on event details.

hope you can all make it!!"

that is all. good afternoon. countdown to "sexy time" at t-minus 2 hours...high five!!!

and work, of course.

here's what I got up to yesterday: kelly konno blurb at www.ricepaperonline.com

Isis review at www.shotgunreviews.com (lyrical lounge)

and my latest for mojo:http://videos.howstuffworks.com/cityguide-boston-video.htm
to see my mug.

i've finally categorized my articles at montrealmojo.com

the reward of all that of course, was a scrabble off, starting at the $2 latte cafe on the corner of st.laurent and rachel to erin's house (indian food and lionel richie forever!) to my house to win by over 200 points....that's right. highlights: 66 points on one word ("quiz" on a triple word), "drivel", "media", "avow", and "wife" for 42 points...that's right, big scores, respect the rage!!!

shameless plug:

 watch me:

www.watchmojo.com (Vietnamese and Japanese) and "helping young designers"

 read me:

www.montrealmojo.com

 thanks for supporting my mojo.

my cell phone history started on a great note. i had an expert hustla with me negotiating the best deal for me. i enjoyed months of unlimited calling which was great for finding an apartment  and job and such when i first  moved back to vancouver. when i was working for roots, i managed to fandangle a flashy deal that guaranteed that i only paid a nominal amount every month. since i moved to montreal, that's when it went downhill. i found that the operators here do not know what the heck they're talking about, and somehow, i found myself locked down into a contract until 2009 and i've had to learn how to use my text messaging to properly benefit from my "great package". my main beef is with the "rogers to rogers" perk, because it doesn't include fido customers, even though rogers bought them out, and everyone i meet who is on rogers doesn't stay in my life long enough to actually make this worth it. grrrrrr.....oh, are all rogers users as fickle as myself? and why can't this apply cross province? because i know lots of rogers subscribers out west....grrr.

ok, so call me crazy for even entertaining the idea that i might garner some insight from OJ Simpson, but a girl was curious about reading letters to the man and how he responded. so, i gave "I Want To Tell You" the quick read it asked me to (i finished it up in french class this morning, one benefit of setting the desks up like we're in high school, i can hide behind the tall redhead in front of me and read contraband english books). 

i gotta say though, that it's some pretty audacious shit. not only does he have the nerve to say things like "paula barbieri is a beautiful model that i started dating..." in the same breath as he talks about how much he mourns the death of his wife, but he picks and chooses the letters to such an extent that you have to wonder. samples are as follows:

"you are the most handsome black man I've ever seen."

"you are a gorgeous man who has never done anything wrong."

uh huh. sounds like someone is in the propaganda bizness. especially with all the time and energy he spends knocking the media for exactly this kind of thing. he prints one letter from a kid who is "sure" he didn't do it and sent his allowance money. so he advised his publicist or whatever to "send back all allowances", puh-lease. the worst part was that "kids" were writing in saying that they "forgive" him even if he did it because "everyone makes mistakes". um, am i the only one that sees a problem with this?! 

any letter that was published that was condoning his behaviour in any way was only included if the author was anonymous or came off as crazy and he questions their "faith"...uh huh, like he went to church before all this. but he does make the comparison between himself and Job, saying that he broke out in athlete's foot after he read the Book of Job, so that's exactly like the boils that God punished Job with as a test to his faith. ok, OJ.

he keeps bringing up Sidney Poitier and Quincy Jones and how beautiful their interracial kids are, as if he's just trying to justify himself in the eyes of those who call him a "sellout". and he shows off his stunningly naive (and sorry to say, American) view of racism as this, "until i read these obscene letters, i was sure this type of thinking had died in America in the sixties" (p.116) and the ultimate headshaker, "back then i thought that racism was a black/white thing, then i realized it was a black/black thing" (114). wow OJ, thanks for the enlightening contribution to a lack of serious consideration of internalized racism and for perpetuating the "fact" that in America, racism is STILL a black/white and white/black issue. if anyone else even tries to bring their platform to the table, they best be prepared to be raked over the coals and give up their virgin daughters to be raped by an angry mob. let us split the baby, samson, and dammit, while we're at it, crucify THIS. 

the following exerpt is an explanation of why i left class for my five minute break and came back 15 minutes later smelling like gauthier and weilding a banana.

even though it takes 5 minutes to get downstairs from school, i really felt that i needed to get some air, and since i managed to score a pear on my first break and an orange on the second, i figured i'd go and see what the last one had to offer. i was walking by and i hear a highpitched scream from a loft balcony on st.denis and it turns out it's my buddy S who i was supposed to hang out with more (my entire faggot army has been SO slow assembling on this side) and i was amazed by his space and his art...and the SWV he was bumpin' in the crib. he also has the new janet jackson poster framed above his desk (good looks, good looks) and reminded me that i'm not sure why it is that straight guys have a problem with the new track.

i found out that he's a model and made him dig out the flier for his show and autograph it for me. i added it to the collection that i started at the bakery with the ad for unity, with all naked boys on one side and all naked girls on the other. what can i say, when it rains, it pours.

too bad my current classroom is so not designed for discretely sneaking back in after such a tryst.

(sigh) i heart gay boys and always will. 

ok, so, other than the fact that nobody told me that it gets dark at 4:30pm every night during the winter (somehow this detail failed to cross the mind of anyone who deemed it necessary to "remind" me of the fact that Montreal is cold) as well as the other forgotten detail of how forward the men are in this town, what is the deal with the dairy?

 seriously. i do not (stupid blog not letting me use contractions) believe that listing the milk at 3.25% fat would fly anywhere else (though i think that homo milk is exactly that).

everything is rich. the ice cream, the milk, the cheese (oh, smoked gouda, my soul mate), and contrary to popular belief, a brie is not a brie (and we shall see when we go for the next Mojo family trip, the first one was to the South Shore on Monday and that was an adventure, video forthcoming) but a good one is soo delicious with aubergines. (and garlic and pesto on little pizzas that i made tonight out of pancakes that i made on saturday as shells).

but the real inspiration for this blog is the yogurt. whoo that mediterranean yogurt that is damn near dairy cake. yep. aint a damn thing wrong with 8.5% milkfat, yall.